Mental Illness

Disgusted when i eat,

disgusted when i breathe,

anxiety at its best,

it has me on my knees.

praying for this to stop,

for this all just to end,

convincing me that depression is my new best friend.

i’ll never be enough,

soaking up the pain,

and all i’ll ever hear is,

“what’s a rainbow without a little rain?”

but this is no rainbow, fairytale, or some sort of fable.

this is mental illness mixed with being emotionally unstable.

It’ll never quit, never fail, never stop

until i hear the noise of a gun go “pop”.

up to my head, is where it’ll be put

and there goes my life,

or should i say, the life that he took.

but i was dead all along,

from 11 up to now

so go on ahead,

take your stupid bow.

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